How to Find a Writing Community That Will Help You Accomplish Your Goals
Even when we have dozens of characters dancing through our minds, this writing business can get damn lonely. We have big ideas and exciting plots to explore, but many of us don’t have anyone to share with, especially when we’re new.
Family and friends may not be supportive, but even if they are, it’s hard for them to grasp what we’re “trying” to do, and it’s even harder for them to be invested in something that lives mostly inside our minds.
Usually, there comes a time in every writer’s life when they crave being a part of a community of like-minded individuals and hope that they can improve their craft by doing so. Humans instinctively desire to be seen and valued as a part of a group—to belong. Not everyone, of course. There are a few outliers, sure. And if that’s you, fly free, my friend.
But if you are looking for a community, I wholeheartedly encourage you to find your tribe because the benefits far outweigh the cost!
Benefits of being a part of a writing community:
It provides a sense of belonging and social connection, so you’re more likely to stay motivated to achieve your goals, overcome the hard times, and celebrate the good! Together!
Shared knowledge and pooled resources. Benefit from collective wisdom and experiences that help everyone grow.
It’s good for your mental health and emotional well-being. Being a part of (as opposed to apart from) creates a sense of purpose and contributes to lower stress levels and increased happiness.
When communities bring together people with diverse backgrounds, perspectives, and experiences, it promotes understanding, tolerance, and inclusion. Exposure to different viewpoints broadens our horizons and contributes to a more open-minded and empathetic society.
Considerations when looking for a writing group or community:
1. Do you want an accountability and support group or a critique group? Or both?
Many writers (my past self included) think we all need it ALL right now! We want accountability, support, and others to read our work to help us make it stronger.
But, I caution you if you are a new writer still finding your voice and deciding what type of stories you are drawn to write. Have patience when sharing and asking for critique of your freshly typed words.
As a new writer who just created something that didn’t exist before, there’s a natural desire to share it and have others celebrate in our excitement.
So we say (as I said to a fellow writer in a Facebook group who I didn’t know), “What do you think?” Well, they told me. Not in a nice way, either. It hurt. I wasn’t ready to hear what they had to say.
Much like I did, many new writers think they want critique when they actually want encouragement and praise. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s what I wanted back then, but it wasn’t what I asked for.
I wasn’t specific because I didn’t know how to be yet. So again, have patience.
Share that you wrote something that makes you happy, but keep the words behind closed doors until you’re in a place to accept what may not be a glowing review. When you are ready for that feedback, be specific about what you want commentary on.
If you are brand new, consider a community that simply offers support and accountability to help you build your writing habits as you learn the ins and outs of writing a novel.
If you want critique, go slow. Start with one, maybe two critique partners, to avoid overwhelm.
Try to find a writer with more experience than you to give feedback or work with a compassionate professional, like a book coach, who understands your needs. Be specific about what you want your critique partner to comment on and be willing to accept what they offer with a spirit of openness and discernment.
2. Are you a large or small group type of person?
You may know this about yourself or need to feel it out. A good way to test is to ask if you enjoy talking to a lot of people at parties. Or do you prefer chatting with a few people you know well?
3. What are the expectations of the group? How often do they meet and do you can take part fully and give back? What happens if you can’t meet the expectations or obligations of the group?
This is obvious, but groups are about relationships; those always have a better chance of success if expectations are stated upfront.
General advice on finding and being part of a writing community:
Align yourself with folks who are writing in a similar vein as you. Find where your people are and hang out there too!
Be kind, respectful, and curious about other writers. There’s nothing wrong with asking questions about how others do this or that. It’s a great way to start a conversation. Yes, talking to folks we don’t know may take us out of our comfort zone, but in general, writers are kind and giving, and without risk, there is no reward.
Choose critique groups and partners wisely by making sure they are fans of your genre, understand where you are as a writer and can articulate why they think something isn’t working.
Accept that personalities and egos will emerge, and that can be problematic. You’ll have to set boundaries, and sometimes it won’t work out. We are human. We err. Move on with grace when you need to.
Where to find a writing group or community:
Professional Writing Associations:
If you know the genre you’re writing, see if there are any professional writing associations in your vein and what options they have. You’ll find people there who are serious about what they do and are usually more than happy to help. Some require you to pay to be a part of it, but not all. Often, these organizations have local chapters you can link up with.
Libraries, bookstores, and community centers:
Your librarian is an excellent resource! They’ll be in the know if there’s a writing group afoot. And don’t discount your local coffee shop owners or the folks at your favorite bookstore. These people just know things. LOL.
Go where the writers are … books, stationery, and coffee.
Online Writing Communities:
There’s a host of them out there in all different flavors. Many have online forums and discussion boards, if that’s your thing. Most come with a plethora of writing resources.
Here are just a few that I know of:
Quill and Cup: I can vouch for this one! Truly great folks there.
Writing Retreats:
These are a great way to meet other writers and build connections, but they are pricey. If you are at a loss for where to look, check out Lisa Shaughnessy’s podcast Your Writing Retreat Connection, where Lisa interviews writing retreat hosts about what they offer and how they help writers.
Asking other writers for recommendations is a great resource, too! Word of mouth is powerful.
Writing Conferences:
Yet another great option if you are up for networking. Spędy, but fantastic for taking classes and meeting your peers. Drawback: you’ll have to talk to people, which is hard for many of us! I know.
Social Media:
There is no doubt about it: writers are on social. If you plan on publishing, it’s part of the job these days.
I began with Facebook Groups (there are a ton of them) and got to know a few people. Eventually, we formed our small but mighty group of four. If you are a Facebook user and write romantic fantasy, I admin a group for fantasy romance writers, and we’d love to have you if that’s your thing. It’s an accountability group, but many have found beta readers and CPs there. I’m not terribly active because I’m currently writing in a different genre.
Twitter used to have a robust community under the #amwriting, but I don’t know what’s happening there now. I’m not an X or Bluesky user, and I can’t speak to Threads either. So basically, I’m no help, LOL. But let me know what you find.
Book Coaches with Group Coaching Options:
Many book coaches, like myself, offer group coaching options. Usually, a handful of writers work with one coach in a community for a specific purpose, like accountability, story development, drafting, or revision. These are great opportunities because the coaches lead the group and ensure a community of safety and support. Plus, you have the bonus of learning from an industry expert.
As a writer, I have loved every group coaching experience I’ve participated in.
Today, it is a privilege to be in the position to offer that back to my writing community.
Here’s a link to my small group coaching program where you can learn more about the structure. Groups are closed for Spring 2024, but there’s a waitlist for the fall cohorts.
Email me at stacy@writeitscared.co to let me know you’re interested, and we will chat.
The challenges of being part of a writing group or community:
One size doesn’t fit all; you’ll need to experiment to find what is right for you, which will take time.
People. People are complex and can be challenging.
Price: Good experiences that help us grow often cost money. Not always, but if you are serious about writing, you must invest in your development.
Varying feedback. Everyone has an opinion, and asking for too many opinions at once is overwhelming. Beware of the “revising to make everyone happy” trap.
There may be challenges, but it is worth it!
Having a community of folks with similar goals and struggles as you, supporting each other, and laughing and crying together are some of the many bright spots of being in this writing life.
It’s something no writer should do without.
It will take some time to find your tribe. But if you are willing to be patient, ask questions, give as much as you get, and take a little risk by connecting, you’ll find the place and people you’ll call your writing home.
