Romance Writing Essentials: Tips for Writing Romance For Fiction Writers
Romance is a genre that seems like it should be pretty straightforward and, therefore, easy to write. After all, the plot is the same: The characters meet, resist love, fall in love, fall apart, then get back together.
Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy, right?
WRONG!
Just because something appears simple, doesn’t mean it’s easy to pull off!
Romance stories are among the most difficult to execute well. Why?
There are many reasons, but the biggest is that structurally, the protagonist’s object of desire is also a major antagonistic force in the story. The love interest is the opposition! Wrangling that conundrum into a satisfying emotional experience takes some finesse, my friends.
Romance is one of the best-selling genres in the world, bringing in over 1.4 billion dollars in annual revenue. In 2021, the market share increased by 41% and it’s not shrinking. There’s a high demand for romance and there’s a lot of competition out there. This makes writing a romance that is fresh and attention-grabbing a challenge if you’re scared to lean into what really interests you or if you’re still figuring that out.
Remember, you are what makes your book unique, and writing is a practice in self-evolution!
So we’ve established it’s hard. Okay, so why do we bother? Well, because we’re writers, and we enjoy pain … er, I mean a challenge. Yes, that’s part of it, but writing romance is just plain fun and rewarding!
I love to read about love, and I love to write about it. You too? Most of us do on some level, which is why the romantic subplot is so popular. It works well when nestled into any primary content genre to create a change that will impact the main storyline.
Today, we’ll focus on making this genre a little easier to wrangle by exploring five key takeaways every aspiring romance writer should know:
There is a difference between a love story and a romance.
Tropes are your friend!
The real thing the characters are up against is actually themselves!
There is a proven structure for a romance novel. Mess with it at your own risk!
Character development gives romance its heart and sizzle, so take your time.
Understand the difference between a love story and a romance.
A romance story and a love story are similar, but distinct. In romance, readers expect two people to struggle to embrace love, and have an optimistic ending. Those are genre conventions of romance. If you mess with them, you will have unhappy readers. The romance is the core of the story!
Now, some romances do end sadly, but they work because before the sad ending there has already been a positive pay-off to the question posed to the meet-cute: (will they or won’t they fall in love and get together)? Take The Notebook, for example. Though the ending is a tear-jerker, with both lovers passing on from their ailments, we see them beat the odds romantically.
A love story can be about two people finding or rekindling love, but the romance is not the point. The story is not out to prove that love conquers all, so you don’t have to have an optimistic ending in a love story. What you often have is a romantic tragedy, like Romeo and Juliet, Wuthering Heights, or Anna Karenina.
Your love story may indeed have an achingly good romance, but all bets are off on the lovers walking with a happy-ever-after.
Don’t be afraid of tropes!
Time and time again, I have writers who tell me they’re worried their romance is cliché. They are trying so hard to steer clear of tropes to create something unique, but can’t find the reason for the characters to resist each other (or spend time together).
A smartly used trope is a romance writer’s best friend.
Readers come to romance for the tropes and the experience these “situations” will provide them. It’s why we might say things like, “Oh, I’m a fan of Enemies to Lovers.” ”Second Chance Romance is my favorite.” Or “I can’t put down a good Forced Proximity.”
Tropes are not cliché. Clichés are tight, confining things without room for a writer to experiment. This is not so with a trope. Tropes are roomy and full of potential to create something new.
Tropes set up expectations in the same way genre conventions do. Then, we are free to create events to reward the readers with the experience they came for!
Tropes help with the plot, too, by allowing us to imagine two people in an uncomfortable situation, which provides us with instant conflict—yup, conflict moves the story forward!
The key to using tropes is to understand them and the expectations they carry, then spin or combine them to make something fresh yet familiar that will pleasantly surprise your reader.
Yes, they can be overdone. If every romance you write has the same tropes written in the same way, readers will get bored. Part of the fun of reading a romance that drives from the same trope is to see how different they can be!
So pick what you love to write and read and what makes the most sense for your characters, then play. Experiment. See how you can bend and blend to make things fresh? Challenge yourself to develop several spins on a favorite trope, and don’t be scared! Be empowered!
Understand the true antagonistic forces of the story.
I stated earlier that a romance is complicated to pull off because the love interest is the primary source of antagonism for the protagonist. (Also, it’s worth noting that though there may be two main characters, one character is usually your primary or alpha protagonist. This is the person who will require the most inner transformation to get what they desire.)
Often, our protagonists try to avoid or eliminate the person they also desire. This will vary in form from outright confrontation to murder, from escapism to avoidance.
This is a character vs. character type of conflict.
Many writers struggle to grasp this angle, thinking that other external forces such as family disapproval, long distance, or political conflicts create the reason the lovers can’t be together in a romance. Those things may contribute in a mighty way, but they cannot be the sole reason for the conflict. Your characters must challenge each other. Romance is about push-pull energy. So make these folks dynamically different and turn up the pressure (this will also help create believable chemistry; more on that in a later blog article, though.)
A new battle emerges once both parties invest in the relationship, and the romantic tension builds—the battle of character vs. self.
The true battle in a romance lies inside the characters. They fear love and they fear what loving the other person means. They fear sacrificing something for that love and what that will cost them. This is what they must get over. Sometimes, only one character has to have this awakening. Still, the best books are when both characters must sacrifice a piece of their persona and embrace risk and vulnerability by facing their false belief. Only then can they become personally whole to fall in love together. When it’s all said and done, the point a romance makes is that we are made into better people through the experience of love because to do so requires us to find some humility. Love changes us for the better.
Don’t mess with the structure. Understand it!
Romance readers come to romance for the characters, not a tricky plot structure. This is a deeply character-driven genre, and there is an expected choreography between the lovers. We expect them to meet and resist (at least one of them), then slowly progress into intimacy where we ache for them to get together, for that intimacy to peak and then degrade back into uncertainty to the point they break up and we’re aching all over again for them to see the err of their ways, get over themselves and be with the one they love… which thankfully they do, so we don’t have to burn the book.
This form, not formula, has stood the test of time. Consider it reliable, not predictable.
A note on intimacy: It can be physical, but it doesn’t have to be. True intimacy is about trusting another person enough to allow them to truly see you. To know who you are inside. When you read about intimacy in romance, think in-to-me-I-let-you-see.
Spend time developing your characters so you understand what the story is really about.
Romance stories always speak to the overarching theme of Love Conquers All. This throws many writers because it’s blah, meh, yawn, cliché.
But not really. Not once you create your characters and understand what they’re missing.
Then, the “all” part of the “love conquers all” statement becomes whatever the character lacks to become whole, and this is represented by their false belief.
For example, look at Outlander by Dianna Gabaldon. What does love conquer for Claire? Guilt and shame. She feels tremendous guilt and shame for not really loving Frank and being attracted to Jamie. External conflicts force Claire and Jamie together and allow their love to bloom, but Claire must let go of her past and her guilt to move forward in this life. It also comes back to bite her later.
Or look at Twilight. What does love conquer in Edward? His false belief is that he is unworthy of Bella’s love because of what he is and that he will hurt those he loves because he cannot control his nature.
The key here is to shape characters with big gaping holes in their hearts. Those holes can only be filled by the love interest when the protagonist lowers their shields, takes responsibility for their actions, and becomes willing to look at their false belief and risk it coming true!
The purpose of a romance is not just to show two people together at the end, but to show them as “better” people because they overcome interpersonal obstacles in their path to love.
Being in love is about becoming wholehearted, but to do that, our characters often need to sacrifice some piece of their individuality (the piece that was only holding them back anyway), say pride or ego or whatever protects them internally, and in the end, the risk is worth the reward of being in relationship with the other person.
Wrapping it up.
Writing a romance is not a simple endeavor. Crafting a compelling romance readers will yearn for requires the writer to understand the difference between a love story and a romance, find ways to enliven and twist well-known tropes, and recognize that the most compelling battles unfold within the hearts of the characters. While the proven structure offers a reliable roadmap, it's the character development that makes the narrative fresh and the chemistry believable.
Here's to crafting tales that not only tug at heartstrings but also resonate with the universal truth that love, in all its complexities, has the power to make us whole.
